Staggering Stories Podcast #13: Voyage to the Banana of the Darned

Dalek Biscuits as messed up by the Staggering Stories team!  Top is our version, bottom is how it SHOULD have looked...Show summary: Andy Simpkins, Adam J Purcell, Fake Keith and Tony Gallichan talk about Doctor Who: Voyage of the Damned, Sam and Max, the PC game Portal, our recent Christmas presents, and a variety of other stuff, specifically:

  • 00.00 – Intro and theme tune.
  • 00.56 — Greetings, yes?
  • 03.34 — Where is Keith?
  • 05.33 – Our Christmas Presents: Fake Keith
  • 08.45 – Sam and Max.
  • 21:50 – Portal.
  • 28.27 – Our Christmas Presents: Adam.
  • 34.40 – Doctor Who – Voyage of the Damned.
  • 63.01 – Our Christmas Presents: Andy.
  • 67.22 – Our Christmas Presents: Tony.
  • 72.33 – Letters and listener feedback.* Hit us yourself at
  • 82.12 — The real Keith sinks without a trace.
  • 84.39 – Goodbyeeeeeeeee!!
  • 85.20 — End theme, disclaimer, copyright, etc.
  • 86.02 — Portal spoilers.

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8 Responses to "Staggering Stories Podcast #13: Voyage to the Banana of the Darned"

  1. Real Keith says:

    Comments on Pod cast 13 from real Keith

    Are you still going on about the new theme, I thought we put this to bed, But if you want to continue!
    I liked it, maybe it didn’t have the ooo factor of the series 1 (Eccleston week) arrangement, but it was better than the middle 8 (series 2/3 Tennant) arrangement.
    You see your looking at the Mona Lisa and complaining that she’s got no eyebrows and the brush strokes are all clumpy. You could say that I ignorant of musical etecate and that I have a tin ear, but this is the kicker, Ignorance is bliss.

    Voyage of the Dammed

    I liked this, maybe it wasn’t as good as Christmas invasion but it was on a par with runaway Bride. But I do have to agree with fake me said (loved the banana by the way)
    There is a fine line between homage (Pyramids of Mars/ any mummy film, Robot/ King Kong or any giant monster on the rampage film, State of Decay, any vampire film, Independence Day, any original idea in every other sci-fi film ever made) and a cheap rip off, and I do think Voyage crossed it.

    The credit crunch

    No I didn’t like it, but I do understand it.
    Yes the BBC do have to chase ratings, if it didn’t we would be on Dr Who season 45, we would still have Tomorrow’s World, Top of the Pops, Strange and god help me El Dorado I wouldn’t have to put up with Neighbours, Eastenders and weakest link. Before you start your rant against the licence fee remember it dose allow the BBC to take risks on things like Nu Who, Life on Earth, Life on Mars, Blue Planet, The planets and Strange. Admittedly this ties it to the government of the day and if it dose any thing that the powers that be thinks is “Anti government” it gets a very loud and very public slap (Apposed to the carpet bombing that ITV received, or was that just the Thatcher Government). It’s that or ITV that won’t risk any money until the BEEB has been there first showing there might be a market there. I will also admit that the BBC has only just started doing this again after the 80’s & 90’s game shows, makeovers and soaps.
    But I digress; the world you describe if it existed was late 70’s early 80’s. Since then there have been many a news story of the national grid being almost overloaded as a major story arc finishes on that night episode of Eastenders, Coronation street and as the credits roll the nation gets up turns off, over the TV, makes a cup of Tea or goes to the toilet. Having said all that you should pick up a copy of this month’s SFX (166). They have started a “Stop the credit crunching now!” campaign.


    Tony if you’ve got the Queen on your money your English, live with it!

    Real Keith

  2. no, you see, that’s the Duke of Normandy on the money……

    I shall reply more fully, either here or in the next podcast which we’re recording on saturday so this may well get read out ahahahahahaha


  3. Real Keith says:

    “Channel Islanders refer to Queen Elizabeth II of the United Kingdom as Duke of Normandy.”

    It’s the Image of the Queen. I’m making a sign of a forefinger & thumb on my forehead. Loo-hoo-hoo-ser!! J

  4. all I can say on the subject is ‘thank you….you’ve given me a great idea!!!’

    now then…the putting to bed thingy…

    just becasue you and I agree to disagree on a subject doesn;t mean it won;t get raised elsewhere – the podcast, for eg…that’s what a review section is for, after all..I mean, theres no point in you and me deciding upon our views, talking them through on a friday evening and then not talking about them to anyone else ever again……I mean…is there, hmm? 😛 I decided with the edit to have a little fun as Id not had much of a chance to actually go into detail on the actual recording due to everyone makiing faces at me and trying to make me laugh, LOL….hey, at least I played a snatch of it…..I felt dirty afterwards, of course, and had to go have a bath….

    However, if I didn;t say this on the podcast then I should have; Keith does have a point about ignorance being bliss. he must live in such a happy world (insert evil grin here, LOL). No, seriously…Ive been looking into the reasons people don;t like the theme and its a little interesting….

    1) a person simply doesn’t like change. Thats it. Nothing else except it’s different. Not many of those about, tbh..
    2) The new versions doesn;t ring their bell…now thats a subjective veiwpoint and one that is either right or wrong.
    3) the person makes a judgement call about the technical side – the mix etc. Thats the catagory I fall into – me and other musicians.

    So, if I dodn;t know things that well, would I enjoy it? I genuinley do not know the answer to that though the fact that I do feel that if Murrey went back and remixed properly, dropped a couple of the elements etc, may well give a possible answer….

    I think the set of people who actually annoy me when talking about this though is the group to whom all new who is brilliant and anyone who disagrees is a twit (Im using a gentle phrase here, LOL)….there is no critical ability, just a blanket praising. That’s not good….I can happily accept people’s arguments about liking something if they have the ability to differentiate between good and bad stuff…..Hence being able to happily chat away to Keithy about things as I know he;ll happily say if he thinks something is bad.

    Plus if I think he may be getting the upper hand all I need to do is say ‘Shatner’ to see him immediatly switch topic, mid sentance, go into a rant about the famous bewigged one for half an hour by which time:

    a) he’s forgotton what we were talking about so by default I win and
    iii) The rpg scenario we’re currently involved in will have been extended by yet another session meaning he can’t get in any more references to horribly beweaponed Japanese ninja schoolgirls……

    Now then…I’ve somewhat waffled so…quickly…

    no, we wouldn;t be on dr who season 45 by now (though we are on series 30 this year, yay!!) cos there would still have been the gap due to the rights issue…re-read Regeneration, oh Reality Advisor.

    Do NOT diss Neighbours – that path leads to much trouble 😛

    Hidden away at the end of the section where we’re chatting about this is me saying ‘Look, just because it IS, doesn;t make it right’. There is a fundemental problem with our society that started in the 80’s and tbh was fuelled by the wrong kind of messages from the 60’s, mixed up with, and slightly subsuemmed (um, not sure how that word is spelt, lol) by Thatcher (a person who’s grave I will happily dance upon – and for me to say that shows just how much I dislike what she did to society). The all-rush, no time to pause television and public is one symptom of this and leads to an agressive, self serving, self centered populace. We are, basically, fiddling whilst Rome burns (in HD).

    Or as the eminent politician, Dame Shirley Williams put it..

    ‘we’re going to hell in a hand basket’

    and just sitting there saying ‘thats how things are, live with it’ is not an acceptable answer to me…a line has to be drawn. This far and no further.

    I just need to work out HOW to go about trying to make a difference……

  5. 2) The new versions doesn;t ring their bell…now thats a subjective veiwpoint and one that is either right or wrong.

    for either read neither
    for or read nor

    thank you, lol

  6. real Keith says:

    1. Of course a conversation is never over, there are always points to be made, mostly when it’s for a new audience. It’s just that in a privet conversation (except for Adam & Andy, who were probably bleeding from the eyes& ears), we reached an accord that if I knew music would probable hate it to. Or if it was mixed properly you might like it but these points weren’t made on the pod cast. Plus I noticed your little edit at the end “that’s how it begins with oo’s & aarr’s but later there are screams”.
    But put to bed was meant ironically, I had a nifty little yellow smiley-faced icon (all big eyes and cheesy grin look here he is look at him, he so cute!… You still can’t see him can you!). It just didn’t come out when I pasted the message a crossed from word (yes that’s right listener I can’t spell for toffee and have to run the more complicated words like ‘a’ and ‘it’ through the spell checker. I shall use 😉 in future.
    2. Whoa calm down chum, pal, friend, mate, and dear I say dude, all I did was to answer your question of whether the BBC needs to chase rating. The answer I think was yes and I gave my reasons for that answer.
    I don’t need or want to get in to an armchair political debate. If you find a system that works and nobody gets hurt, I will be right there on the hosting along side you. But at the moment where I work I’m surrounded by people who do nothing but bitch snipe and moan about the state of the world, how much better it would be if they run things. Solving the world’s problems in the coffee break, then have the gull to feel just and smug about it. But can’t be bothered to get off there fat lazy arse’s to even cast a vote when an election rolls round. It’s becoming a Shatner of an irritation (the level not the actor). I shall speak no more about it, for that way lays darkness, pain and bloodshed.

    Yes it is a very nice place in my head, full of sugarplum fairies and fuzzy widdle bunny wabbits being slaughtered by Daleks and Sith lords.

  7. for ‘fuzzy widdle bunny wabbits’ read ‘Gungan’ – this is, after all, Keith…..

    the trobuel, I expect, with your work ‘collegues’ is that they may well get their info from such august publications as ‘The Sun’ (more on that litter tray liner next podcast)

    There is only one system that will work and that is if I take over the planet. I will, on the whole, be a nice tyrant – I mean, who else would provide free doughnuts? No, seriosuly for a second – and before I become number one on El Presidente’s hitlist – sorry if I got serious, but as you say, it’s building up inside me…and no, I don;t mean Shatner….I may go postal some time this year…….which for me means sending letters signed ‘disgusted of Crawley’…

  8. stephen says:

    i dont think you made that cookie properly

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